Are We Masters of Our Own Destiny?

Some people argue that we humans are “the master of our own destiny.” But it strikes me that such a statement is too simplistic and too narrow. The reality is far more complex.

I readily agree that human choice and human action play a crucial role in determining what we ultimately become. That fact is widely recognized and quite universally accepted. 

But too often the master-of-our-own-destiny proponents fail to acknowledge the impact of certain facts/factors that are totally—or to a great degree—beyond our control. Our touted “master” role is significantly limited or enhanced by the “cards we are dealt.” Following are some of those limitations/enhancements.

No humans have any input whatsoever into where they’ll be born and at what point in history they’ll arrive. Those two facts alone make a huge difference in the scope of options available as we seek to carve out our individual identity and destiny. 

We don’t choose our parents. We don’t choose our siblings. We don’t get to choose whether those around us will be wise or foolish. We don’t control whether they’ll be kind or cruel. 

We don’t get to decide what worldview our family, our community and our nation will subscribe to. We don’t get to choose what roles are already set firmly in the well-cured concrete of tradition when it comes to gender, age, social status and numerous other  characteristics.  

We have no say in whether the religion (or lack thereof) espoused by our family or our community will be liberating or enslaving, inspiring or destructive. 

We don’t get to choose whether our family and our community will be wealthy or impoverished. 

And these are but a few of life’s many early facts/factors about which we have no input whatsoever. So right from birth, some people have major advantages and others are heavily disadvantaged

We often hear about people who have “pulled themselves up by their own bootstraps.” But the reality is, some people start life with neither metaphorical boots nor bootstraps. So high achievement is dramatically more difficult for them than for those born into a situation of plentiful opportunity and an array of structures that support those with vision and initiative. 

Monique Worrell, state attorney for the Ninth Judicial Circuit of Florida (i.e. the chief prosecutor for Florida’s Orange and Osceola counties), says that people—especially children and youth—“can’t live what they haven’t seen.” While the truth she postulates isn’t absolute, it’s certainly true to a great degree. In fact, the Bible says: “Where there is no vision, the people perish” Proverbs 29:18 KJV.

Those born into situations where self-improving behavior is rarely if ever modeled find it nearly impossible to visualize the full range of “what could be.” Conversely, those born into a situation where family and society provide affirmation, have high expectations, ensure that opportunities for self-improvement abound, and model through example the pathways to achievement and self-actualization—those people have tremendous advantages.

Another area over which we have no control—or only the most minimal control, especially early in life—has to do with such things as intelligence, physical functionality and health. Handicap or injury, whether sustained prenatally or postnatally, can limit a person’s potential dramatically. And the negative impact is far less likely to ever be overcome in situations where medical and other rehabilitative mechanisms aren’t readily available.

And there’s also the impact of luck. 

A lot of “self-made” people—who pride themselves on how much they were able to engineer their own destiny—don’t like the word “luck.” But luck, fate, chance, randomness or something similar play a much bigger role in a lot more lives than many realize or are willing to admit. 

I once heard General Colin Powell describe in a public forum how he responded to questions about the secret of his success. His said: “I worked like a dog, and luck noticed.”

The fact that General Powell diligently and persistently sought to improve himself wasn’t any guarantee that he would get to the top. But it did increase the probability. Yet he was wise enough to recognize that things could have taken a different turn. Luck happened to work for him.

Had he not been in certain situations, he wouldn’t have come to the attention of certain people who were instrumental in his advancement. Had he appeared on the scene a little later or a little earlier, the competition might have been more formidable or the obstacles greater. Had he not encountered some writer or speaker or teacher or friend who shared insights that were life-changing, his life certainly could have been different.

Four lines in Thomas Gray’s poem “Elegy in a Country Churchyard" highlight the fact that often the qualified, the gifted, the exceptional aren’t the ones who get the attention and rise to the top. Gray says: 

Full many a gem of purest ray serene  

   The dark unfathom'd caves of ocean bear:  

Full many a flower is born to blush unseen,            

   And waste its sweetness on the desert air.  

An online AI comment about the foregoing lines says they describe “hidden beauty and wasted [unrealized, I’d say] human potential.” The AI comment says those lines compare “poor, unknown people to bright gems hidden in deep ocean caves. . .  [meaning that] ordinary people might have great talents, but poverty [or some other disadvantage, as we’ve just noted] stops them from sharing their gifts with the world.”

In Ecclesiastes 9:11, Solomon reiterates this reality: “I have seen something else under the sun:

The race is not to the swift

      or the battle to the strong,

nor does food come to the wise

      or wealth to the brilliant

    or favor to the learned;

but time and chance happen to them all.”

In short, Solomon acknowledges that final outcomes can’t be engineered with absolute certainty. Hard work and talent don’t guarantee positive outcomes, though they heighten the probability of such. Disruptions, accidents, unforeseen and uncontrollable circumstances arise that change what would probably have happened had the playing field remained more hospitable to those with the most talent and the greatest likelihood to prevail.

I’ve highlighted the fact that every human must face some—or many—circumstances that are totally outside their control or over which they have the most minimal control. Obviously, in such situations, the human agent is not the master of at least that part of his or her destiny.

However, life’s challenge isn’t to achieve perfection. Nor is it just to outperform all or most of our peers. It is to ensure that we seek to build the best destiny possible, building on whatever hand we’ve been dealt.

Although we are not the masters of every aspect of life, our diligence and persistence makes a substantial difference in our destiny. As our successes increase, and as we can find fulfillment and satisfaction in what we’ve achieved, we must not overlook the advantages we may have been given by the hand we were dealt, as well as the additional boosts we have received in the form of luck and the contribution of others.